April 6th, 2013 (6:03pm)

i hold my cigarette in my right hand and your hand in my left. i inhale more addictive chemicals off your skin than from my cigarette, did you know that? the addiction to you is stronger than nicotine, and i know it’s killing me, but i can’t help it love. i chain smoke, and with each fraction of a second each and every thing you do in tandem makes me fall for you, like the ashes that i flick to the ground and the butt that i toss onto the concrete as we walk down the sidewalk alone. the only difference is that i won’t let you slip between my fingertips, i’ll hold you there and won’t toss you to the pavement for the birds to pick at; to become part of the world yet looked over. you will stay with me darling, and you will shine like the Mickey Mouse watch i never take off; the one you haven’t asked me about yet. and i will love you when you do’t love yourself, as you do me, and we will be great baby, greater than this dull sidewalk and greater than the full pack of Belmont’s you were so eager to buy. for i hold you in my left hand, close to my heart and while one half of me is choosing to die slowly, i know you’re the saviour, just on the other side making the entire process beautiful. 

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